It's been awhile..

It's been quite a while since my last post. And I'll be completely honest about why - I don't know that I want to share what has been going on in my life lately.

There have never been times before in my life where I really wanted to question God. It's kind of annoying because now that I'm a little older, the more I learn you would think the more answers I would have, but it's the exact opposite, I have more questions than ever.

I'm going through a time of trying to figure out what I believe about different things. My views and how I feel about things aren't all matching up with what God's are - which makes sense because He is perfect and I am definitely not.

Career path-wise, I'm starting to get a clearer picture of where I'd like to go. Hopefully I'll come out of school with a double major/double minor (I'll update the profile with all that) and work with behavioral disorders in kids. Long-term I still want to be a full-time mom and have my own kids (hopefully a whole bunch of those little guys) and then I want to be at therapeutic mom for other kids. I'll do a more detailed post to explain all that later, I'm just trying to catch everyone up.

Everyone wants to hear about my faith life..well...I think about God a LOT these days. However, I'm kind of avoiding things like church or my 'God friends,' because a) I'm not at the same place a lot of them look like they are at spiritually and b) I'm figuring out MY beliefs, and I don't want those influenced. I don't want to live someone elses faith because that's what they experience, I want to figure this out just me and God.

Which leads me to where I'm at now. This summer I'm a CA with UNL (see updated profile) and it's a pretty easy job, so I'm going to have some free time. This summer, I'm determined to let myself enjoy being a kid for awhile. People are always telling me I need 'me' time, instead of spending my whole life helping other people. While I 100% disagree with that, I'm finally going to relax and just BE. I'm processing through a ton of stuff with having to had to grow up being the adult parent starting when I was pretty young and for this summer, I want to let myself not be the adult for everyone else. Maybe I'll even let other people worry about me for a change. Or not, because that would feel really weird.

Apologies for such a vague post, but I wanted to get some kind of update out there for everyone. Hope y'all are having as fantastic a summer as I am. :)

Still joyful.
:)