"You Deserve It."

I spend all day fighting to un-learn the American dream. "America" says that we are entitled to, have earned and deserved bigger, better. Always more, never enough. I seriously hate pity parties but I threw myself one that lasted all afternoon. It was pretty pathetic, friends. Just because I had been up the night before late moving, a storm and crazed cat had encroached on my less than full nights sleep, and my kids were crazy, I suddenly was having these thoughts, and maybe you can identify, like:

"I deserve a break."
"Someone should really recognize all the hard work I'm doing."
"I have earned these kids respect and they should pull it together and stop ruining my day."

First of all, number two on that list is totally bogus because I receive constant recognition and gratitude for my work. No one feel sorry for me and think I'm getting ignored because I'm the furthest from that. Second, while I was eating lunch with a co-worker, she told her thoughts on getting birthday wishes telling her to "enjoy your birthday, you deserve it." What she said, while I wish I had changed my attitude but tomorrow is another day, has kept me thinking...

"Thanks for all the birthday wishes friends!! It was so humbling as I read all the posts and text messages. As I read the comments I was feeling so loved! A couple people had wrote on there have a great birthday you deserve it. As I thought about those words I realized nothing in me "deserves" a great birthday. I am a sinner simply just as broken as the next person. Yet God chose me, loves me, and gives me constant grace. See Jesus "came to give us life and life to the fullest" and I love that when he said that he didn't mean a new car, a huge house or even a huge amazing birthday party. But when he promised to give us life and life to the fullest he meant we can have endless peace, love, joy, grace and forgiveness! And as I sit and reflect on turning 26 I praise God for those gifts he freely chose give me!"

Talk about a change in looking at the world around you - I agree whole-heartedly with what she said, and thank goodness God put us on lunch together so she could remind me of that before I spent the rest of my week being and making those around me miserable. 

I don't deserve or earn anything, but boy, am I thankful today for a God that gives me unending gifts of love, joy, peace, patience, grace and forgiveness.