Reflections From the Hive

The time-out rooms at Behaven are not a fun place to be and if you're employed by BH, you spend a quality chunk of time in there, guaranteed. Being sworn at, kicked, hit, spit and drooled are fast become normal occurrences in my life. In the time-out rooms it is of utmost importance not to talk to the child or cater to them until they complete their time-out correctly - my attention is what they want, so depriving them of that is a consequence (for all of our magic parenting wisdom including time-outs I highly recommend getting your hands on Mini Methods or Madness).

Anyway, while I'm busy monitoring a child, there is a lot of time to be filled with thinking to avoid going crazy hearing high pitched screaming and being called more names than the dirtiest of rap videos for twenty, thirty, who knows how many minutes the tantrum might last. Who knew my new favorite (and most frequented) praying spot would be in the time-out rooms?

Prayers that started out - "Please dear GOD make ______ stop screaming and sit down already," "Please don't let that bruise, - changed as I started to realize that the behaviors the child exhibits doesn't mean the child is 'bad.' Everything a child knows is learned from someone, somewhere. God reminded me that the kid I'm focusing on is only repeating what they have been taught. The harder the child kicks, the louder they scream, the more inappropriate and offensive their comments, the louder came God's reminders that these kids are both crying out for help while trying to hold help at arms length in the only ways they know how.

As adults, parents, teachers, we are responsible for teaching the next generations - by being endlessly patient and responding out love to these children instead of out of anger and frustration, it might not look right away like I'm having an impact. But by teaching these children with love how to make better choices, showing them there are different ways to deal with different situations, they might be able to have better lives for the rest of their lives - results I will probably never see. God keeps reminding me that these kids are loved and valuable, exactly like me. Pretty sure that's what matters.

Two Thumbs Up for Employment!

Well, everyone - I did it. I made it through four years of undergrad and have officially graduated from the University of Nebraska - Lincoln!! I know it said on all the invites something about Boys Town in the fall and what-not, but that was kind of my 'well, if nothing happens' plan. The big news is....I got my (for right now, not for forever) dream job! For the foreseeable future I will be staying here and working with children at Behaven.

For these next few months I am a child behavior aide - we diligently work to help children change negative behaviors into positive one using rigid structure, consequences and abounding measures of love and patience. Everyone always wants to know what exactly Behaven is - the best way to describe it is the 'problem kids' you know of in schools, day-cares, etc. are the ones who come to Behaven. We work on behaviors ranging from being unable to focus and follow directions to more serious behaviors like aggression, spitting, etc. 

I love it. I am loving being employed full-time at a job that I am passionate about and challenged by! 

During my three-ish weeks of unemployment between graduating and starting last week I had a lot of time to just be and pray. A lot. There were many long runs and sits by the lake nearby praying, praying, praying. I've been praying for years that the Lord would use the passions he has given me and fit me into a job that uses all of that - plus, when I'm engaged in my passions I enjoy myself most. Who doesn't?

While I was praying - where am I going to go, what do you want me to be doing, I need a job, etc. - God was busy doing what he does best. Putting me right smack dab where He wanted me to be, when he wanted me to be and not a moment sooner. Let me show you a slice of the road map that got me to this job.

1. Becoming an RA in 2011, where I was on staff and found some of my best friends, including Miranda.

2. In the Summer of 2013 I run off to Colorado for two weeks to 'find myself.' I give up because I felt God telling me to go back while I was climbing up a rock. Had I stayed in Lincoln for those two weeks I would have been desperate for a job and found....who knows.

3. On the drive back to Nebraska from Colorado, Miranda hooks me up with a job and I'm on the payroll 15 minutes from hearing about the position.

4. Because I was employed for Summer, I didn't need to look for a Fall job until late August, where I found the Nanny position with Thatcher (2013).

5. Thatcher and I attended countless PT and OT appointments at Madonna, where I developed friendships with his therapists. They get to know me pretty well.

6. Discussing my plans for graduation I mention Boys Town as a vague possibility and one of the therapists asks me if I had ever heard of Behaven. No, I had not. This is how I found out about Behaven.

7. I pick up an application at Behaven and inquire about positions - at the time they weren't hiring but said fill out an app anyway. I was semi-disappointing, but if you spend enough time out at a lake praying, praying, praying, sometimes things happen - like peace. Sometimes peace is weird when your brain is freaking out about bills and life and you have no job, and yet, you have unexplainable peace.

8. Just after I get the application filled out a very close friend winds up in the hospital, which kept me in Omaha a fair amount of the next week.

9. After he recovered, the next day another friend got hit by a boat and that delayed my application drop-off by another two days.

10. I apply for other jobs and get an interview at a normal daycare (puke). I set-up the interview half-heartedly - I did not want to work at another daycare. Not what I was hoping for after earning my degree...Two weeks have passed and I figure, well...might as well drop the Behaven app off. I do so the day before my daycare interview.

11. During the interview, I missed a phone call. The phone call was from Behaven! They wanted to interview!

12. Long story short, positions were suddenly available. And here we are today. :)

God is good. Sometimes mystifying and difficult to understand and constantly more patient than I but ultimately He is always good.

The End.